In honor of National Book Lovers Day, I'm sitting down to think about one of my favorite books that I've read to my children and how it's impacted my parenting.
As a parent, there’s almost nothing harder than seeing your child upset. Whether they’re sad, mad, or frustrated, my instinct is to fix it. I want to offer solutions, distractions, coping strategies—anything to help take the pain away.
But time and time again, I’ve found that when I rush in with advice or ideas on how to feel better, it often makes things worse. My child gets more overwhelmed, more upset, or even shuts down completely.
That’s when I remembered The Rabbit Listened by Cori Doerrfeld.
The Lesson Behind The Rabbit Listened
If you haven’t read it, The Rabbit Listened is a beautifully simple yet deeply powerful children’s book about emotional support. It follows a young child named Taylor who experiences something heartbreaking. One by one, different animals come along offering their own version of help—telling Taylor to shout, to fix it, to forget it, or to get angry.
But none of that feels right for Taylor.
Then the rabbit comes. The rabbit doesn’t offer solutions. The rabbit doesn’t push Taylor to feel a certain way. The rabbit just…sits.
Quietly. Patiently. Lovingly.
And slowly, when Taylor is ready, Taylor talks.
Learning to Be the Rabbit
I can’t count how many times I’ve found myself wanting to be one of the other animals in the book. I’ve wanted to cheer my child up with silly distractions. I’ve offered deep-breathing strategies mid-meltdown. I’ve explained logic to a crying four-year-old as if that would suddenly help.
Spoiler alert: It didn’t.
The truth is, my kids don’t always need me to solve their feelings. What they really need is my presence.
When I take the Rabbit Listened approach, I simply sit with them. I don’t jump in with fixes. I let the storm of their emotions pass however it needs to.
Some days, after a few minutes, they crawl into my lap for hugs and kisses. Other days, they sit on the floor near me, quietly playing or just being still—needing closeness but not words. And sometimes, they want nothing at all except to know that I’m still there when they’re ready.
Trusting Our Kids to Feel Their Feelings
The biggest thing The Rabbit Listened has taught me is that I can trust my kids to go through their own emotions. My job isn’t to stop their feelings. It’s to give them a safe space to feel them fully, at their own pace.
Sometimes comfort looks like a warm embrace. Sometimes it looks like silence and space.
Either way, I’m learning that just being there—without fixing, without rushing—is one of the most healing things I can offer.
Final Thoughts
If you’re a parent navigating big feelings in your home, I highly recommend reading The Rabbit Listened—both for your kids and for yourself. It’s a beautiful reminder that we don’t always need the perfect words or strategies.
Sometimes, we just need to sit.
And listen.
And love.
